There is a mother, bent and gray, her children grown and living.
They shower her with words of praise, for all her love and giving.

Another mother down the street is nursing her grown daughter
Whose body’s wracked by this disease; her life is stolen from her.

And on this day a mother cries as newborn life spills forth;
Her precious son blinks in the light and cries for mother’s warmth…

It is no surprise that post birth our bodies change drastically. Along with that physical change comes an added spiritual change. Raising children is no small task. It has been argued that motherhood is by far one of the most important tasks on earth, because we as mothers are shaping the future leaders of the next generation! In my own heart I carry a deep conviction that these days with my little boy are meant for greater purposes— for kingdom purposes. But in order to truly grasp that and live it out, I have to put my “mom pants” on. Let me explain.

It was about a year ago, now, when we first learned that there was possibly something wrong in my pregnancy. On that sunny Friday morning in April, I traveled to Dallas alone for my 12-week pregnancy checkup. Trey stayed home with Kate, and I was looking forward to eating at Chuy’s by myself after the appointment. It was to be a routine checkup, but it became very un-routine when when my obstetrician couldn’t find the baby’s heartbeat. We walked two rooms down to have a sonogram performed. Once the sono tech placed the wand on my gel-covered abdomen, I was quickly relieved to see the screen light up with life. My relief did not last long, though, for in a matter of moments, both my doctor and the sono tech were discussing with me nuchal translucency, genetic testing, and a possible chromosome abnormality.

To the one whose beautifully messy day to day never seems to measure up to the always climbing invisible mark of social media perfection. To the one who never feels like enough but in the same breath feels like too much. To the one who hands out handfuls of grace so freely but can’t seem to receive it for yourself… This letter is for you.

When my soul feels heavy and the sounds of our home feel overwhelming, I sing praises.