Dear Single Self

February 14, 2016  - By Gretchen Saffles

Dear Single Self Header

the struggle

I wasted a lot of years wishing I wasn't single. I shed too many tears over the present gift God had given me to be wholly devoted to Him and wished away precious moments wanting tomorrow's "blessings". Even in marriage I see the common theme come up of discontentment in my heart with current seasons of life that can only be satisfied through a deep love for Christ and a steady intake of the Word of God. I dug this letter up that I wrote to my "single self" and my single friends to share with you today, but I believe it is a reminder to us all (in every season/stage of life) that true, abundant life is now in Christ. Not tomorrow. Not someday. It is now, right where God has us.

The question remains, will we use today and this present moment for His glory?

Dear Single Self (& Single Friends), You are not alone. I feel I need to repeat this so it sinks into your heart, you are not alone. In the world of singleness it is easy to feel, well, singled out. Kind of like you are wearing a scarlet letter that say available and alone. You may feel lonely and you may feel hopeless, but don't allow feelings to direct your steps. God has promised to never leave you or forsake you. Never. He has promised you life that is (John 10:10) Your years are not wasted and your life has already begun. Don't look ahead to what might be. (Matthew 6:33-34) Be grateful for the beauty of today. Each new moment is a gift from the Lord and is also a trust.

How are you using your singleness to bring glory to your Creator?

God calls us to different things in different seasons of life because He is sovereign. Every married person was once called to be single. Most single people will one day be called to marry. Paul reminds us to live as we are called and to be thankful for that calling. Sister, Satan does not want you to use your singleness or enjoy its blessings. One day when you are married, he will still do all he can to rob you of joy. The evil one is always looking to distract you from the moment God has you in and the purpose to which He has called you. You have to fight His schemes. The way you fight is to rejoice with others (yes, even your friends who are getting engaged and married), and to make much of Christ where you are. The only way you can do this is to fall madly in love with Jesus.

Singleness Story-2

Don't waste your time wishing it away for tomorrow. Use your extra moments (when you may feel alone) to cherish God's Love Letter to you, the Bible. Even on Friday nights when you may be home alone (or on Valentine's Day that comes around each year), choose joy and spend time worshiping your Creator and getting to know Him. His love will never fail you. He wants you to know the depths of His heart and to make the most of each day. Expect great things from your great God. Believe Him. Trust Him with your deep desire for marriage.

As Elisabeth Elliot once said, "Unfulfilled longings are material for sacrifice." Abraham gave up his precious son, Isaac, because he trusted God's greater plan. In return, God gave Abraham a ram. He blessed Abraham's willingness and his offering because his heart valued and worshiped God alone (Genesis 22).

Offer to God what is most precious to you, even if it is a desire to be married. God treasures these humble offerings.

The more you get to know Him in the Word, the more you will trust Him with this desire. Sister, you are valuable for the Kingdom of God. You can do things for the sake of the Gospel that many can't do. Go, adventure the world and serve the least of these in the name of Jesus. May your life point others to Christ and your love be for Him. Trust Him with your days. You never know what He has planned for tomorrow. He loves you more deeply than any man on this earth ever could. His ways are best and His plans are beautiful. Take heart, be strong, live fully and fall in love with the One who satisfies every longing. He is worthy.

your sister,

share this post:

Post Categories:

Fix your mind on gospel truth

and apply God's Word to everyday life with our weekly articles. Sign up below to receive the full article in your email inbox every time a new one is released!

  1. Stacey Brichacek says:

    Thank you! This is perfect! What I needed to read and be reminded of this weekend! ❤️

  2. says:

    I randomly come read your different blog posts to be encouraged to keep seeking after God. Today during some spare moments I read this post and oh how my heart needed to hear this. Thank you for continually encouraging the single ones and reminding us to make much of Christ. Gretchen, you are an incredible woman of faith who I look up to. So, thank you for all you encouragement whether that be through the blog or Instagram or Periscope (yes, I follow and keep up with you on all)!

Leave a Reply


join the

helpful links

When you sign up for our emails you will receive encouragement straight to your inbox, shop discounts just for our subscribers, free gospel-centered resources, and Well-Watered Shop updates!

about www

everything give me jesus journal

the book

free resources

back to top

affiliate program

rewards program


contact us

refund policy


what we believe